Recently I posted a meme expressing how my peers and I feel when we are dismissed in certain conversations and categorized by certain people because we do not have children at this time. Some of us, like myself, enjoy a freedom of choice. Others of us just have not had the opportunity to give back to the world yet. But this meme, it addresses a few facts about the childless population. Notice how I chose the words facts and not opinions. Let’s explore a few.
*I have extra money to loan out and extra time to do things for you.
Has it ever occurred to you that those without children see the sacrifice of money and time that children bring? Despite the beauty of that unconditional love, If we (those without kids) DID NOT create that environment for ourselves then we did not plan on sacrificing our time and money until we decided the reason was good enough. I am not automatically available to babysit your kids when I am not working. The same 24 hours that you felt were not enough before you had kids are still that insufficient amount that we are stuck with. I didn’t suddenly get more time when you got kids. And money? Since when are the childless deemed the “Richie Rich?” The money I make I just choose to spend or save differently. So stop expecting all your childless friends and relatives to pick up the check because just like it ain’t no extra in your house, sometimes there isn’t any in mine either.
*I don’t have as many responsibilities as you, I’m less tired, or I’m irresponsible and you aren’t.
Since when are children the only responsibility in the world? I mean for those who chose to go to school, their responsibilities include student loan bills. I’m responsible for taking my medication or I would seize constantly. If a woman did not understand how to access health care, like a responsible person, then her child may be at risk for defects, both before and after birth. If you aren’t a responsible driver then your Honda may rear end a flatbed truck. To say that I need to have children to understand the definition of responsibility or how to be tired is flat out ignorance.
*My life has no direction or meaning, I have “growing up” to do, my life is easier than yours, I’m missing out.
These are some of my absolute favorites.
I must’ve missed the lesson that taught me that I needed another human being to give my life purpose. Honestly, if I don’t know my purpose and my life has no direction, I shouldn’t be procreating anyway. That’s a whole other problem for a whole other post, though.
And aren’t we all growing? If you are still the person you were 5 years ago, 2 years ago, then you are the tragedy here not us. I hope to still be growing with my spouse and with and through my children because that is a part of life’s cycle. Jerks. Lol.
And what about having children makes your life so hard? You do know they did not ask to be born. They simply love you unconditionally and think that you do the same. Some people would love to complain about having children, but unfortunately, they struggle to reproduce. Others are mature enough to know that children require that you be selfless and we still are learning to be selfish. That’s not needing to grow up. That’s grown enough to know that I won’t need a revolving handout because I’ve put myself “in a bind Nate” (you’ll only get it if you’ve seen Set It Off scene with Jada Pinkett Smith).
In summation, just be careful at how quickly you are to pass judgment at those of us who are childless. Maybe we just don’t want kids because we are too selfish to make those sacrifices, and that’s ok! That doesn’t mean I’m making them for you either, though. Maybe I can’t have kids and all your antics are offensive and hurtful. Either way SO WHAT?! I don’t have kids.
The Government Needs to Stop Punishing Us Though